Dieting as a Team Sport: Reduce the Fat, Increase the Love

In an era of growing obesity around the world, weight loss is a matter of health and it can be a matter of life and death, especially for a relationship! While the genders may vary, it is quite common for one spouse to lose interest in the other due to increased weight gain.

One classic illustration played out on the Oprah Winfrey show, where a (quite pudgy!) cruelly judgmental husband proceeded to say the most insulting and debilitating things to his wife who happened to be heavier than him. He claimed to be trying to help her. He said he wanted her to improve, but this pattern of criticism and insult had gone on for years and it was clearly not helping the dieting goals of either person! And it was about to destroy the marriage it was supposed to improve.

When one partner in a relationship begins to demand change from another, it creates an opposition that may be more damaging to the relationship than the behavior it attempts to correct. First, correct the relationship alliances, then approach the behaviors in question. In most cases, it would do far more good to join the heavy person in a mutual eating revolution than to stand apart and criticize them.

Many people eat or drink or smoke excessively as a means to reduce anxiety and while changing behavior might benefit them any approach that increases anxiety risks making both the problem and the relationship worse.

One psychological secret of relationship is that partners almost invariably mirror each other's psyche at many levels. One may eat too much while their thin partner smokes too much or has bouts of anger that are out of control. Given this mirroring, a wise approach to change is "If you see something in your partner that you don't like-- change it in yourself.

This reduces the mirrored effect with no criticism or focus on the partner. It models self-control which is the best form of behavior change. Throughout history, the greatest teachers are not those who want to be the master over someone else but those who can master themselves!

Whenever we try to change another person, we create an opposition that invites competition and resentment. When we try to control another's behavior we activate a basic resistance to being told what to do. Being told what to do puts the teller in a position of power and dominance over the recipient, and invites rebellious behavior. When told to lose weight, many spouses immediately gain weight in order to prove their independence and save self respect.

If we join our partners in self improvement, we can create a team approach in which no one need to feel inferior, or be controlled by another person. Each person can contribute to the team effort and mutual encouragement and mutual success can strengthen the bonds. How we define the boundaries of the group make all the difference. It strengthens my resolve to have an ally in change, while it distracts my focus to resist both my own habits and someone who is trying to control me.

If both partners need to lose weight, why not mutually study the issues and create a shared approach to shopping, cooking and dieting that brings both together rather than antagonizing both. Criticism is a negative force in any relationship and it generates negative reactions that do not further the positive goals of weight loss.

If one party needs to lose more weight than the other, they can simply adapt portion sizes to suit each individual, rather than isolate and stigmatize the heavier person as the only one needing to change. Avoid the sort of forces which have often contributed to overeating in the first place. Creating a loving, supportive, team effort is much more likely to engage loyalty and activate a desire to please the other, which can help in losing weight.

And if only one person has the weight problem, there is likely to be a mirror of excess somewhere else in the picture. While one person cuts back on the calories, the other could count and reduce the number of cigarettes, or the frequency of anger outbursts or maybe just the frequency of criticisms that can poison the relationship. Don't let "self improvement" goals become an excuse for abuse that can divide and conquer both parties. Form a team with both parties on the same side!

Frozen Vegetables: the Good, the Bad, and the Unhealthy

I recently came across Birdseye's new "lightly seasoned" frozen vegetables that you can microwave in the bag.

The creamed spinach advertised that it is all natural, so I took a quick glance at the package and snatched it off the shelf.

How bad can that be, I decided. Upon further inspection of these frozen seasoned vegetables, here is what I found......

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Shedding Light On Nonalcoholic Fatty Liver Disease: Gene Mutation Linked To Accumulation Of Fat, Other Lipids In Liver
A team of scientists from the University of Utah and the University of California at San Francisco has discovered that the mutation of a gene encoding a ketone body transporter triggers accumulation of fat and other lipids in the livers of zebrafish. This discovery, published in the Feb...

Almond Butter: The New Peanut Butter?

If you haven't tried almond butter, it will grow on you.

It not only is nutritionally better for you than peanut butter, but it also has a different taste and texture.

Give it a chance and you will come to love almond butter that has a wide variety of health benefits.

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Appetite Accomplice: Ghrelin Receptor Alters Dopamine Signaling
New research reveals a fascinating and unexpected molecular partnership within the brain neurons that regulate appetite. The study, published by Cell Press in the January 26 issue of the journal Neuron, resolves a paradox regarding a receptor without its hormone and may lead to more specific therapeutic interventions for obesity and disorders of dopamine signaling...

Lose 7 Pounds by Ditching Mayonnaise

When working on weight loss we are often told to avoid all creamy sauces and condiments.

But, you ask, "Mayonnaise is just eggs and oil, right?"

We know eggs and some oils are considered healthy foods in moderation, so why then is mayo on the do not eat list for weight loss?

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Metabolic Side Effects Such As Obesity And Diabetes Caused By Antipsychotic Medications
In 2008, roughly 14.3 million Americans were taking antipsychotics - typically prescribed for bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, or a number of other behavioral disorders - making them among the most prescribed drugs in the U.S...

Rise In Heart Disease Prevalence In The Gulf States Linked To Rapid Urbanisation As Well As Cultural Habits
While the rapid improvement in socio-economic conditions is thought responsible for the high rates of cardiovascular disease in the Gulf states, deep-rooted cultural factors also play a part. "We're sitting on a time bomb," says Professor Hani Najm, Vice-President of the Saudi Heart Association, whose annual conference begins Friday 27 January...

Fuel for the Race of Life with Dean Karnazes
What does it take in food, training and conditioning to 350 continuous miles, foregoing sleep for three nights? What does it take to run accros Death Valley in 126 degree temperatures, and run a marathon to the South Pole in negative 40 degrees. What kind of body does one need to have to swim across the San Francisco Bay, scale Half Dome in Yosemite and mountain-bike for 24-hours straight.? Dean Karnazes knows. He has done all this and more. Men's Fitness Magazine says "Dean Karnazes might just be the fittest man in the world!" On seven different occasions, he's run a 200-mile relay race solo, racing alongside teams of twelve. Dean is a Ten-time Western States 100-Mile Endurance Run Silver Buckle winner, has competed across the globe, and is the 2004 Badwater Ultramarathon champion, considered: 'The World's Toughest Footrace.' We talk with Dean about these extrodinary accomplishments and how he fuels his body and mind to do what he does. Dean is sponsored in part by Nature's Path Foods and he consumes Nature's Path foods for energy.